Just When I Get My Head Straight

So, as I am driving home from scrapbooking tonight, I think about men, and how pretty much every year at this time I am alone, and that it is going to be OK this year too.

I realized that all I want is not be alone. So, in order to do that, why don't I enjoy the people I DO have around me, and all my friends all over the country?

Then I get home, check my email, and ... meet a cool guy online.

I swear.

My Nubbers

How cute is that smile??

Looks just like Steph.

Looks just like Nate.

Every time I see a picture of my sweet-smelling nubbin', Aidan, I think, "He looks so much like Steph when she was a baby!!" Then sometimes I get a picture and I say to myself, "OK, there he looks like Nate." But most of the time, he looks like my little nephew.

He's so cute, I just want to eat 'im up!!!

Thanksgiving Thanks

A tradition that never caught on in my household was to say what you are thankful for right before we dove into the dinner. I think that it never caught on for two reasons:

1) My dad was always embarrassed.

2) My mom was worried the food would get cold.

So, I've decided to show a list of all the things I am thankful for.

• Me, Myself, and I: I'm reliable and fun. I can always count on me being there.
  
• My job. It's nice to have money.
• My family. Especially my sweet, precious nephew.
  
• My FRIENDS. I can't live without them. Seriously.
• All my invites for Thanksgiving dinner. It's hard being away from your family on the holidays, but friends made up for it this year.
• Books.
  
• My Dish DVR. Which will make my Thanksgiving holiday a little less lonely.
• Food. I mean good food. Not that crap we ate in Disneyland.

Ok, that was a pretty cheesey list, and I meant for it to be much more thoughtful and poetic, but I guess I am just not in that mood today. I guess I am just thankful for all the basic things in life.

Oh, And I am Brazil

I could be Brazilian. Except for the waxes. OUCH!

You're Brazil!

You're athletic, charming, and probably a good dancer.
Unfortunately, you don't really mind chopping down the rain forest, and you probably
consider homeless people expendable in certain circumstances. Of course, your
personality is so diverse that it's hard to track down exactly what you're like. You
definitely like Pele, the World Cup, and shouting "gooooal" at the
top of your lungs.


Take the Country Quiz
at the Blue Pyramid

I Was Just Thinking About This Last Night

Tracy and I went to see Love in the Time of Cholera last night, and there was a parrot in the movie. And I thought, "Parrots are so beautiful. I wonder what it would be like to be a parrot?"

Then I took Crystal's quiz.

And I totally want a cracker. And a pirate to sit on.

You're a Parrot!

You're a born follower and will model your behavior on that of
anyone you admire. You usually carry this into speech as well, mimicking whatever
the people around you say. You mimic whatever the people around you say. This
doesn't leave you with much of an identity of your own, and you may wind up vulgar
or polite depending entirely on your environment. You'd be great at taking
dictation, or maybe being a court reporter. You want a cracker!


Take the Animal Quiz
at the Blue Pyramid.

Offical Disneyland Steps for Removing Vomit

Disneyland workers do not know how to clean up vomit. You would think that if they created a ride such as Space Mountain (one of my personal favorites!), that they would have a vomit removal artist. Someone who would come in with a flourish and remove the offensive vomit so the rest of the ride goers, who aren't so squeamish, can actually get on the ride.

However, this is not the case.

On our fourth and final day in Disneyland- The Day of Loose Ends - we wanted to go on Space Mountain. Again. For Amy and I, for the fifth time. We get almost to the front of the line--maybe a two minute wait--and the line stops. The ride controllers are running empty carts through the ride. A genuine pet peeve of mine. It makes me so frustrated to see empty carts going when I could be on them! Ride broken, be damned!

Anyhoo, after a couple of minutes, I noticed why we were stopped: someone had gotten off the ride and vomited everywhere. Amy and I had a good time wondering who it could have been: was a little kid? An older person?

Then the maintenance guy came out to clean it. Yes, maintenance.

The Disneyland Official Steps in Cleaning Up Vomit:

1) Throw paper towels at the offensive material. Hope it disappears. Even though you are NOT David Copperfield.

2) Take your trusty broom and sweep the paper towels. Try to make a bigger mess than already existed.

3) Throw more paper towels at the offensive material, making sure to make faces while you do this.

4) Repeat step 2.

5) Spray disinfectant on the area, which by now is twice the size of the original offensive area.

6) Stand there, waiting for the disinfectant to dry. This may take some time, but be sure to look really bored and disgusted.

7) Repeat step 1.

8) Repeat step 2.

9) When you are done, do NOT, I repeat do NOT, bow or notice the applause you receive for doing a job that no one else wants to do.

I did not applause. He didn't do a very good job.

Disneyland Day 2

When I went to Disneyland last year with the family, everyone raved about the Buzz Lightyear ride. Even Dad had fun on the ride, and his official Disney name was Grumpy. Needless to say, this year, I had to give it a shot. Literally.

Amy and I did early entry, so we got right onto the ride. We took both the blasters and went to town killing "Z"'s and sending the Evil Zorg back to where he belonged. And when we got off the ride, we could email ourselves a picture of us mid-battle:

Disneyland, Here I Come!

For those of you who do not know this, I love Disneyland. There are many reasons as to why I love Disneyland, but few understand the reasons.

You see, I am not the typical person who loves going to Disneyland.

1) I do not like random kids all up in my shit.

2) I do not like paying a million dollars for a freakin' ice cream cone.

3) I do not like random strangers all up in my shit.

4) I do not like big crowds.

5) I do not normally strike people as "happy".

6) Did I mention I do not like people all up in my shit?

HOWEVER:

1) I love seeing random kids see Mickey for the first time and go apeshit.

2) I love seeing Mary Poppins for the first time, and literally getting misty eyed with nostalgia.

3) I love Star Wars and Indiana Jones, although the Star Wars ride leaves MUCH to be desired, I still love it. (My favorite memory was last year when I went with my cousins, and Mikel, the middle one, said when it was over, "That's it? Well. We'll have to go again." Then he got up, bought himself a Yoda doll, and got back in line. I had never been so proud in my life.)

4) I love being in the happiest place on Earth.

5) I love vacation. Anywhere.

6) I love sunny California. Especially when the weather here sucks monkey ass.

So, I go off now to leave you for the week while I am in SoCal enjoying the warm-ish weather. When I get back, I will make you suffer through all of my pictures. I am planning on getting a picture with me and all the princesses.

You see? I DO like Disneyland!

My Car

After saving $210 for a new car, my current car breaks down. Again. No, it's not a piece of crap. It just hates me. And parts from The Pep Boys. Because The Pep Boys don't use love to fix the cars, they use hate and refurbished alternators that inevitably break down again, one week after the warranty expires.

Ohhh, how I hate expired warranties. Doesn't anything come with a lifetime warranty anymore?

Dating Issues

My friend Emily emailed me yesterday and asked me if I ever have the problem of dismissing men before the first date is even over.

Yes, yes I do have that problem. If they do not IMMEDIATELY fit into my prescribed notion of what I want in a man, I dismiss him quicker than I can say, "I love you, Bono!" But I also think I should listen more to my instincts because of what happened with Randy: At first my instincts were like, "Ehhh, whatever." But then he kept pursuing me, and what girl doesn't like to be pursued, really? So I fell into the debacle I like to call The Mistake of Ought Seven, not to be confused with The What-Was-I-Thinking of Oughts Three to Five.

But I do have this problem. (And thank God it sounds like I am not the only one.) I often wonder, aloud sometimes, if I am being too picky. Do I have too much of a hard, set-in-concrete list of what I want in a partner? Am I looking for something that doesn't exist? Am I setting myself up to be alone forever because I never give anyone a chance?

And am I totally bitchy for not giving all men who are interested in me a chance, too? Is that hypocritical? But then I think, How can it be hypocritical to want the very best? I give myself the very best that I can, and all I ask for in another person is the same thing. And if he can't even look me in the eye as he is talking to me, then that is not the very best.

Apple Pie, Apple Milkshakes, Apple Turnovers, Apple Doghnuts, Apple...HEAVEN!

Every year, Tracy and I try to make a trip to Apple Hill outside of Placerville, CA. This year was no different. And since I can't wait any longer for Tracy to post cute pictures of her baby, I will.

Tracy, Tonna, Matilda and I all headed out for the two to three hour drive, depending on the traffic. We weren't in a big hurry, but we should have been: they close early!! NOOOOO!

I love Apple Hill for all of the appely goodness. There is everything Apple that you can possibly imagine. Oh, and there's other stuff, too. But APPLE MILKSHAKES are the BOMB DIGGITY!
Matilda agreed wholeheartedly and wouldn't let go of my straw.

She got to ride a pony; I wanted to, too, but decided against it because once around a dirt track actually makes me feel sorry for the ponies. Also, ponies smell kinda bad.

Apple Turnovers was closed (Damn their black souls!) but Apple DOUGHNUTS were there, and boy, do apple doughnuts make me a happy little girl! (There is a picture of me sniffing my doughnut bag, but I don't have a copy of it yet.....)

Matilda and I had fun taking our pictures in front of the cutouts:







I was trying to hold her up while sticking my head in the other hole. It didn't quite work out the way I planned.

Overall, we had a wonderful time in Apple Hill, and next year when we go, we will be sure to leave extra early so we can really get our fill of apples!!

Blogging

Although this is National Blogging Month, and dedicated bloggers will blog every day, I will not. I am just not that exciting, and frankly when I get home, I just don't feel like blogging. Especially about how someone ticked me off, or how someone was dumb, or how someone in general sucks.

But I do like the words blog, blogging, blogger, and blogged. I absolutely love how the words sound and how they look.